Dear Ellie
Hi, you don't know me yet. My name is Jason Spencer. You'll come to know me as Dad Father, or perhaps Pa Pa! I'm 26, have a decent job at a movie theater, and am married to a wonderful woman. Her name is Ashleigh or what you will know her as, your mother. It's February 21st, 2016. Deadpool is the top film at the box office. Love Yourself by Justin Bieber is the number one song. Barack Obama is in his last year of presidency. Hilary Clinton just won the Nevada Primary while Donald Trump won the primary in South Carolina. This is a small snapshot of the world you are about to be born into. You are due in 3 short days, on the 24th, but could come at any time. There are primarily two emotions I have about your arrival. Those being overwhelming excitement and a little anxiety. Growing up I always thought that once you turned 18, you wake up and just feel like an "adult". That you finally know what you were doing. Let me be the first to tell you that isn't the case. There will be days when you think you have things figured out. Most of the time though you are just going through the twist and turns that life gives you. Now don't get me wrong. You aren't unexpected. In fact we have been planing for you awhile now. But as you get older you will learn that change can be scary at times. When you arrive my life is going to change completely. I've never been a father before, never changed a diaper, bottle fed, or rocked a baby to sleep. In fact I can't remember the last time I held one. I have some anxiety about that. Most of all though is I can't wait to learn. I'm so excited to meet you. Hold you, sing to you, and talk to you. Wipe away your first tear, make you have your first laugh. See you learn to crawl, stand, then walk. Introduce you to the films I love, the musicians I overplay, and the books that I've worn the spine out of. I haven't met you yet but I already love you so much. I think about you all the time. Honestly though what I am most excited about is to see the person that you grow up to be.
While I know I will have some influence on the person you become. I can't wait to see who you decide you are. Like you I was once days away from being born. Over the last 26 years my parents, friends, strangers, good times, bad times, etc. have all had influence on the person I am today. But in the end I decide what kind of man I am. It will be the same for you. The only person who can decide what kind of person you will be is you. I so privileged to be able to witness the start of that. Now it's not always going to be easy. There will be times when you don't like me. There will be times when you think I'm the best. But know that no matter what I will always be here for you. I love you Eloise Rey Spencer. I'm so luck to have you as a daughter. By the time that you read this I hope to have lived up to my responsibility as your Father. See you soon.
Love, your father
Jason Spencer
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